Depression is inevitable. It is not just in your mind.
You don’t know how depression feels when you just think depression is just pain.
It is not just all about pain.
And, it is not just all about what you think.
Do not judge people with depression because you don’t know what they have been into.
Instead, be there for them no matter what.
Be there for them when no one else does.
Even with that simple act of light, you can save a life.
Have you been into that dark spot in your life when everything is falling down,
everyone belittles you, everyone mocks you,
all of your loved ones hurt you,
you are tired of crying, you are tired of blaming yourself,
you are losing hope, you feel so weak,
you feel so small, you feel so empty,
nobody’s there to listen, nobody’s there to talk to
and nobody’s there to love you?
It is not easy.
But, don’t choose to take your own life
because it will not solve everything.
You don’t know what’s life after death.
And, you don’t know if life ends there.
Life is a never-ending story.
When I was small until teenager years, I have been bullied in school.
I never cried. I don’t cry.
Maybe because I don’t want to burst out and produce conflict.
My pure and innocent mind was so lucky to study in a religious school
because I met God which I remembered talking to him in my mind most of the time.
Being bullied in school has never impacted me that much
and I haven’t felt being so depressed.
I am just ignoring everything they say
and I guess my guardian angels are covering my ears.
I just don’t want to talk to people because I am very shy.
But, I am very talkative at home with my friends in the neighborhood.
What makes me feel weak and uneasy
is when loved ones or people close to my heart hurt me emotionally.
I don’t care about other people because they are not important to me
and they don’t matter because they will just come and go.
But the important people in your life;
family, friends and special person
are my greatest weaknesses.
I cry in agony; a little exaggeration with that word.
But, I am stumbling down in bed with tears all over my pillow.
My family doesn’t see me cry; I smile, I laugh.
My friends don’t see me cry; I laugh, I drink.
But, a special person might do.
I am a very vulnerable person.
That’s the truth.
I’m the kind of person who doesn’t want to talk and argue
and If I did, either you are special to me or I had enough.
To be emotionally and mentally hurt is the greatest pain of all
because it never ceases.
It comes back when you are feeling down again.
Believe me; that happens all the time.
When you reach to that point when everything’s falling down,
no one is there beside you,
negative thoughts are looping inside your head,
and you want to keep every pain you are feeling,
please don’t hesitate to pray.
To release your emotions and neutralize it within you
can make you more relieved and calm.
If you believe in God or not,
the universal belief to truly attain peaceful thinking
and acknowledge yourself despite the disapproval of others
can boost up your self purposeness.
Most of the time, dwelling in that situation will just make you think more negatively.
You need to divert your feelings and might as well run away from toxicity in a matter of time.
And by saying run, let go of that toxic environment.
I did that and it helped me.
From time to time, you need to look at life positively.
But first you need to sorround yourself with positive people
and remove yourself from an environment that triggers you to doubt yourself.
You need to have a better perspective and be brave enough to see the world.
If you think you are toxified by all of the people around you,
If you can’t breath and grow,
Then its time to restore yourself and let go.
Think of this —
Look at your surroundings.
Look at people when you commute or travel.
What if you are that person or the person next to him?
Think of the less fortunate street dwellers.
Imagine the things that you might experience if you are in his shoes.
You are so blessed in many ways; believe me.
Think of your talents, abilities or physical assets.
There will always be an advantage within you.
The positive things that you have right now
are the things that others are desperately hoping for and wanting to have.
There is no perfect life.
They aren’t perfect as well; No one is.
But, you could make your life better by improving yourself.
If there’s no one to motivate you, motivate yourself.
By listening to a positive music or reading positive articles
Or maybe you could go to your church alone and say all of your pain to God; that pain will ease a bit.
Or you could draw your focus on arts and music.
Try learning to play an instrument or learn how to sketch real faces & beautiful sceneries.
Try creating poems or songs using your feelings.
Try letting out your emotions through singing.
Record everything you’ve created and how you view yourself will improve.
I did all of that and it helped me.
By then, you would realize that you are not what they think they are.
You are more than that.
Believe in yourself.
The past few years, I have been always praying for help.
You might have thought that the help you are looking for is slow
but God has been helping you in small different ways that you are blindly seeing.
Yes. That’s right.
I seldom pray for gratitude and that’s shouldn’t be the attitude.
When I started praying for gratitude and thanking God for all of the blessings,
My life has been improving little by little.
I didn’t realize that my perspective in life changed.
Sometimes I could see myself as an empath; looking at other person’s shoes when I’m thinking.
Sometimes I could see the positive things despite the issue or a tragedy.
I have been slowly engulfing positivity in my negative life.
People will judge you because they don’t know you that much.
Dogs bark when they don’t know the person.
There will always be people that don’t bark.
Not all people are judging you; don’t judge people too.
Please bear in mind that you know yourself and God knows you better than they do.
Ignore them as much as possible. Silence might help.
Toxic people will be contagious if you will closely go to their level of thinking.
Please stay away. Run slowly.
And please don’t take that literally because they will think that you are crazy. LOL
If you are not strong enough to say the truth;
or let’s say, the truth that you have been believing is different from theirs
and you think you can just produce fire,
then dwell in your truth and pray.
Be the version you think you are most capable with.